Today marks day one of the nine-day vegetarian "diet" we go through. The Asian veggie diet, mind you; we will not eat anything that comes from animals either. This is perhaps the fifth year, no, maybe sixth year.
I think I'll take up habitual writing again. Not because of spare time but because it helps me reinforce English.
It's funny how short my sentences become here as opposed to in an essay.
Endeavor is also a verb, so that may or may not be excusable, depending on context.
ReplyDeleteShort sentences are good. I am completely serious. Flowery, majestic writing fails miserably in untrained hands. However, despite not having taken a class with him, I would presume that previous instances of your blog writing are not in a style suitable for Thurtle's class. Instead, I would recommend reading better stuff rather than producing more of your own writing which may vary widely in quality. I believe I have already made you enough recommendations to last you well through the year (and probably the next several, actually).
You did not ask for criticism, but writing won't help you unless you get it, and I doubt you'll analyze your own writing as strictly as I can:
Specify "we" in your first sentence. I can guess that it refers to your family, but it's not clear at all.
It's consumption. Consummation is analogous to completion, and has both religious and sexual connotations that I hope you did not mean to imply.
If you mean vegan, say it.
Don't end a sentence with either. <-lol@irony
^H^H^H^H^H^H is good style. Strikethrough is acceptable, but exudes noobishness. Simple deletion is obviously immune to complaint. The "no, maybe" form is a perfect example of something that is acceptable (but still inferior to either of the first two options) in a blog entry, but not anywhere else.
That last goes for dropping the second half of that sentence, too.
Comma between "time" and "but."
It's not funny. Don't say it is if it isn't.
If you want the same done on anything longer than 5 lines it will have to wait till Friday.
Oh, and you're not really that bad, I'm just strict. Even my own writing has plenty of flaws.
ReplyDelete"American Pie"
ReplyDelete~Mary
As horrible as my grammar is, that's not the problem I try to tackle with blogging. I write because I need to get used to words flowing out.
ReplyDeleteGrammar is easy to fix anyway, it's style that most people are bad with.
ReplyDeleteYou're still not getting it. It's not the style. It's the quantity of words.
ReplyDeleteYou should have said so. There's a difference between being able to write well and being able to write easily.
ReplyDelete